Saturday, 9 November 2024

REVIEW: RED ONE


3/5

Red Notice

123 Mins. Starring: Dwayne Johnson, Chris Evans, Lucy Liu, Bonnie Hunt, Nick Kroll & J. K. Simmons. Screenplay: Chris Morgan. Director: Jake Kasdan. In: Theatres.

Christmas has come early here in the Far East, with the game 'Red One' from 'Jumanji' reboot director Jake Kasdan. And what more could you expect, here in Japan, with a land that changes its Halloween decorations to Christmas ones, the minute we stop asking, "trick or treat", in time for the next rising sun? All whilst pumpkins lay rotting on porches across the United States, through fall. Tested in other territories before its North American release, 'Red One' is not to be confused with the 'Red Notice' Netflix blockbuster Dwayne Johnson starred in alongside 'Wonder Woman' Gal Gadot (although, she does get a hilarious mention here) and 'Deadpool' Ryan Reynolds. Although Chris Evans, blazing after that fantastic cameo, does a good job of bringing that type of heat to these festive proceedings by the fireplace. Roasting everybody's chestnuts.

The naughty and nice pair of Captain America and Black Adam must save Santa before it's too late this Christmas Eve. Just as 'Fast & The Furious' franchise star and 'Hobbs and Shaw' spin-off wheel man Dwayne Johnson got everyone to stop using "The Rock" in the middle of his name, the all action hero in a Schwarzenegger mould seems to be wrestling with the problem that his films aren't making bank any more. If that wasn't enough, it seems his character is losing the festive spirit in a naughty age that refuses to play nice. Let's hope this all changes with his 'Jingle All The Way', as the ever likeable eyebrow raiser has always known that real action men know how to poke fun at themselves, doing so with the wand of 2010's 'Tooth Fairy'. And as self-serious as this Yuletide hit to the frosty jugular is, Johnson is still rocking and rolling around the Christmas tree. Having as much fun as Macaulay with cardboard cut-outs of Michael Jordan and more mannequins than a Kim Cattrall movie. In a few Christmases time, this will be a festive favourite when you're home alone, and you want to leave your brain at the door with the blow torch.

Armed in green and red, hell for leather, turning Hot Wheels into anything but Micro Machines with some tech straight out of Hank Pym's 'Ant-Man' toy collection, this former DC hero is a marvel in what looks like a 'Guardians Of The Galaxy' ensemble, assemble. Be it, with its giant talking polar bears, reindeers, minus the real red one, and a mythological agency looking to take control of its own multiverse of headless horseman madness. Just when you think nothing could get you in the festive spirit, Steve Rogers in a Star-Lord jacket is here to save the day. We all know the inspired integrity Chris Evans had as Cap (he has a Bucky Barnes looking kid here), but he was Johnny Storm before all that. A comic-book 'Loser' with so many hilarious overgrown frat-bro credits to his name. Whether it be 'Scott Pilgrim vs. The World', 'Not Another Teen Movie', or a Marylin Manson video...although we now know who the real douche is. I'm too old to be talking about "eras", but if this was back in time, like these movies, we'd be in his Human Torch one. With this, 'The Gray Man' saving villain, and so much more in store. Like Avenger action figures this Christmas.

Filling your stockings with wish upon a star power, an angel of Charlie, part Bosley, part Black Widow, is also on the case, as it's great to see Lucy Liu back and killing it on this bill. She's seriously good, as is 'Rain Man', 'Beethoven', 'Jerry Maguire' and original 'Jumanji' legend Bonnie Hunt as Santa's better half. Although she is almost as underused as Goldie Hawn in the first 'Christmas Chronicle'. Speaking of the angel in a red dress, aside from many festive treats and Xmas cameos, not to mention a delightfully deranged and daft Nick Kroll, it's the big fella himself who gets all the cookies for this film that's milking 'tis the season for all it's worth. Kurt Russell, Tim Allen, David Harbour, Bryan Cranston, Paul Giamatti, Richard Attenborough, the late, great James Earl Jones. The list of actors that have played Father Christmas is longer than Santa's one. But Academy Award-winning, 'Whiplash' actor J.K. Simmons is whip smart as a protein shake Nick (what else could you expect when you have The Rock to spot?). Placed under your tree for the eve of a Christmas franchise from screenwriter Chris Morgan ('Fast & Furious', 'Wanted') Amazon MGM, Seven Bucks and The Detective Agency, will we see a 'Red Two' like the great Bruce Willis, John Malkovich and Helen Mirren? Let's keep notice to which list this makes. TIM DAVID HARVEY.

Further Filming: 'Fred Claus', 'Violent Night', 'Tooth Fairy'

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