REVIEW: DEADPOOL 2

4/5

The Cable Guy.

119 Mins. Starring: Ryan Reynolds, Morena Baccarin, Zazie Beetz, Julian Dennison, Brianna Hildebrand, Stefan Kapicic, Shiori Kutsuna, Leslie Uggams, Karan Soni, Bill Skarsgard, Terry Crews, Rob Delaney, T.J. Miller & Josh Brolin. Director: David Leitch.

"In time you will know what it feels like to lose. To feel so desper"...ahhh f###sickle! Wrong movie! Chimichanga's these timelines are confusing! And oh Canada is it any wonder? As Ryan Reynolds fourth wall and ball breaking, merc with a mouth that has probably kissed your mother is back for 'Deadpool 2'. But this time he's armed with a one-eyed Willie you Goonies. Wait...Josh Brolin? Didn't he just purple reign as the mad titan Thanos in grimace mo-cap for 'Avengers: Infinity War'? Can Stan Lee do that? Yet Yentil's after redeeming two Human Torches what more would you expect from the studio that turned Wolverine into a f###### tree kebab? Or a man who made quite the impression in 'Men In Black 3' convincingly playing a young Tommy Lee Jones, K? And in today's movie world with the ever expanding M.C.U's six degrees of superhero separation (play it with any films cast...go on...we'll wait) running out of Hollywood's biggest names to play all their heroes story arcs. Don't be DP 'Home Alone' aftershave slapped pose surprised that the Marvel machine are casting two-by-two Noah. As Brolin hits f### it, gives maximum effort with the chest expander and takes the 'Jonah Hex' off his superhero career like a DC Universe 'Green Lantern' (yours truly even signals a bat#### hilarious Batman reference to the man who almost donned the Dark Knight's cape). Forget being the star of the summer, reuniting with Benicio Del Toro's Collector character for the 'Sicario: Day Of The Soldado' sequel. This Cable guy is in two of the biggest movies of the year, this month. All now with one Mickey Mouse glove, Disney McDuck money signed check for who you may as well now call Mr. Marvel. As not only is a jacked up Josh, Marvel's biggest bad yet. He's also your Cable provider. We're sorry Keira Knightley may have range, but she didn't get the part this time. The flat top, 'Tokyo Ghoul:re' red eye (talk about a snap of the fingers), Terminator time travelling buckshot and Bucky Barnes arm goes to the mettle and brawn of Brolin. As he reunites with Marvel just weeks later for another 48 hours in Wade's world for Deadpool's number two straight outta main street. X gon give it to ya...again! Cue the music. Because this one sounds better than a crisp high-five.

TAXI! It's time to make sure you haven't left the stove on and call your friendly neighbourhood cabbie (the endearing Karan Soni returns with as much baggage in the trunk as...well someone with someone tied up in the trunk of their car (well...that's just lazy writing)) to hitch you a ride to your local theatre before this one vanishes. Because everyone may be watching the new Avengers film 'Infinity' times and beyond, but it's time for a real Marvel to go to war with Thanos...like...well himself. And armed with two guns and katanas like Wolverine in Japan, Deadpool is done playing with himself. It's time to see if he Stark plays well with other smooth criminals. Namely Josh Brolin who with a click of his dusty fingers goes from a barney with Barney, to an old man prospecting hobo with a shotgun. Vancity's finest, straight outta 'Hillside' Billy, Ryan Reynolds is back in the saucy, red and black leather number and cracking wiser, better than ever. As the smart ass chap in sex doll spandex has so many great one liners he could make Tony Stark's Iron Man look like Fun Bobby without the alcohol friends. Showing Hugh whose really the greatest showman. People magazines sexiest man alive all those years back, who here under the red hood looks like Krang from the Turtles popped out of that big lugs chest cavity, brings even more depth here to this comedy with more heart for a character whose own one can't stop. How's this for a 'Proposal'? The first 'Deadpool' was a rom-com people (and there's more sweet loving with 'Gotham''s crossover Morena Baccarin. Who in real life is actually married to Commissioner Gordon (cue the Anthony Mackie, "well...this is akward" gif)). And in regards to this hallmark sequel, family matters. Like the formidable fire of 'The Hunt For The Wilderpeople' actor Julian Dennison, who shows Marvel's NZ search for hilariously offbeat Kiwi talent didn't just end with that movie and 'Thor-Ragnarok' refreshing director Taika Waititi and his rocking Korg character. Time to print more pamphlets for the revolution....wanna come? And the pissing contest, cocksure Wade Wilson played by this heartthrob with Hollywood royalty on his arm and by his side (the real reason he'll never really regret putting on Hal Jordan's ring when it lead to a whole new one), shows the vulnerable half to his meta-human. In some enhanced acting, from a one of a kind industry talent who recently revealed in a significant stand of solidarity that will mean so much more that even a man like him too suffers from anxiety. Hats off to Reynolds too for his realest and raw performance of the disfigured anti-hero for hire from Hong Kong neon to the samurai swashbuckling of Tokyo, Japan that is still deliriously funny. The blades of Hannibal will always be king. So how about a trilogy trinity?

But X marks more than the D-spot (that's what it's called...right?!) in this force of a movie. What more could you want from a new anti X-Men team and family franchise of Marvel movies that will come from the X-Force across the chest, that's more than a little derivative from the symbol of 'Wonder Woman', all the way to Wakanda? Let alone all these new mutants. That collosal tin-can voiced by Stefan Kapicic behind all that CGI and mega Negasonic Teenage Warhead played brilliantly by Brianna Hildebrand (whose gone from Sinnead O'Conner to a punk rebel teen with an electric whip girlfriend played lovingly by Japanese/Australian Netflix's 'The Outsider' and 'Unforgiven' actress Shiori Kutsuna) are back. But there's even more to the deserted mansion than meets the ice cream this time. Even 'Empire's' returning and loving Leslie Uggams can see that and she never did find the cure for blindness between all that cocaine. You're going to love a sky-rocketing and diving team that features the old muscled spice and Bedlam of 'Brooklyn 99's' own 'Expendable' Terry Crews. Saving the day like his show alongside the Pennywise of 'It' himself, Bill Skarsgard and even more super surprises. Including new fan cosplay (don't forget the Vaseline) favourite Peter with the power and responsibility of type one...and two diabetes played by comedian Rob Delaney. But how about the lady lucky of the afro blown out, Zazie Beetz who has a "Holy S###" real life name even cooler than Negasonic Teenage Warhead? This wonder of a woman has bad guys falling all around her as the laid back, but never toppled Domino. Swagger stealing the whole show as luck would have it even if her amazing 'Atlanta' partner Donald Glover's own 'Deadpool' cartoon hasn't made it past the comic-book, geek approved cutting room floor. Although 'This Is America' people. We think the Childish Gambino whose about to perfectly play Lando in his own Solo 'Star Wars' movie, who was also seen prowling round on the Marvel 'Homecoming' Spider-Man set like his name was Morales again has a lot more going for his brighter than ever stardom spotlight right now. But in a class cast that even ups the ante like the energy of the first film here (like the villainous Francis of Ed Skrein. Who ended up being the hero of the hour last year that 'Hellboy' needed. Stepping aside and socking it to the whitewashing of cultural appropriation), you can't forget barman and best friend T.J. Miller of 'Ready Player One' fame. Not to be confused with departing director Tim Miller (our bad last review...that's what rewrites are for), here replaced by 'Atomic Blondes' peroxide powered David Leitch. The 'John Wick' stunt chereographer who makes this sequel like the one for the man who killed a man with a pencil (a f###### pencil. All because a man killed his dog...I mean who does that. A dog is for life. Disposable henchman are just for moviemaking Christmas), just as good as the first, making up for in epic excitement what the original does in originality. From the parody shows Canadian Celine, 'Titanic' themed Bond beginnings (the actually amazing 'Ashes' for a film that has some real emotion and soul too...inbetween all the Scoutmaster Kevin jokes) and self-aware in-jokes that don't just throw arrows at the sons of Martha. To the 'Atomic', amazing, M.C.U. out boxing, hand to metal arm combat action. From a prison break, escape plan that's truly a riot. To a fast and furious, curb crawling, armoured convoy lorry jack that even takes the concrete out of that bridge busting 'Die Hard 4.0' point for all you string-vests out there. But when it comes to ageing action-heroes. In this movie that has everything, even dusty suit Easter Eggs, it's Josh Brolin's Cable that really hooks you up. Spinal tapping and dialling it all the way up past eleven on some futuristic weaponry that breaks more lead than this half metal, all muscle man does arms. Dare we defy Thanos (a monster of a best-yet villain that even convinced us that he had a point in wiping out half the universe, to perfectly balance the other) by saying Brolin's laid down Cable anti-hero is even better? Because this gold standard, classic character has a gauntlet of power and the stones too. Travelling through time, albeit grounded in reality. With murder on his mind, but with so much soul in his space too. And with daddy needing to express some rage in the best post-credit scenes you've seen in this universe yet, every inch of this is so much more fun than a sandpaper dildo. No need to touch yourself tonight. TIM DAVID HARVEY.

Further Filming: 'Deadpool', 'Avengers: Infinity War', 'Green Lan...just f###### with you.