Escape From New Year.
104 Mins. Starring: Kurt Russell, Judah Lewis, Darby Camp, Lamorne Morris, Martin Roach, Steve Van Zandt, Kimberly Williams-Paisley, Oliver Hudson & Goldie Hawn. Director: Clay Kaytis.
Ho! Ho! Oh no! He doesn't do that boys and girls. That's just a myth like the one about how he doesn't exist. C'mon! It's Christmas! And if this doesn't get you, or this Scrooge in the Christmas spirit the night before then God help us I don't know what elfin hell will. There's big trouble in little Chicagoland this season and we aren't talking about the Cubs chances of winning the pennant. It's a good job 'Escape From New York' and 'Little China' legend Kurt Russell (a man so much a cool as hell legend he even played a f###### planet on the second volume of 'Guardians Of The Galaxy'...and we still didn't think it was Ego...he kind of got away with it) has dusted off that 'Bone Tomahawk' and 'Tombstone' 'tache and beard he Western rocked for his big-three concluding 'The Hateful Eight'. Because Snake Plissken, Jack Burton and even the King, Elvis himself is dusting off the (sort of) big, red suit to play a grubby, grunged out version of yours truly, for one night a year, St. Nick. But this isn't the first time. Kurt once donned the get-up and set up shop as a mall Santa (and there's a tongue in reference here when you thought it wasn't time for Easter Eggs yet) for his son star of '22 Jump Street' and 'Overlord' Wyatt (Nice name Earp! Love it! Please tell me your dog's called Huckleberry?!) when the regular one quit his job for the working day like that Tic Tac dispensing one in the beat up station wagon from 'Home Alone'. Now how nice is that? Hash-tag, 'Father Of The Year'. And here "trading eight reindeer for 400 horses", red riding around in the American muscle of a Dodge Challenger for a sleigh. Dunking presents down your chimney like Chicago Bulls G.O.A.T. Michael Jordan. And prison cell block rocking out to 'Santa Claus Is Back In Town' with the Miami man 'Soprano' who backed up the boss, Bruce Springsteen off Broadway and E Street on 'Santa Claus Is Comin' To Town'. You better watch out. Kurt Russell is the greatest Father Christmas of all time off the Miracle on 34th Street. Sorry Tim Allen. You better not cry. You better not get kranky. UUUEEG!
Streaming Christmas cheer for everyone who pays for a Netflix account and all their friends who scrounge off them (hands up...I used to be guilty) to hear...and watch. The new way to watch movies gives us one of Yuletides best alongside the fellow 80's icon, turned second career wind cult legend, Bill Murray's 'Lost In Translation' reunion with Sofia Coppola. This time snowed in to New York's Carlyle Hotel for a singing special of the Rat Pack blues, lonely Christmas bliss alongside the likes of 'Oceans' own George Clooney and the beautiful 'Silent Night' of Miley Cyrus for 'A Murray Christmas'. As a matter of fact, put this stocking up by the fire next to Bill's 'Scrooged', the Nic Cage Christmas Carol of 'The Family Man', the man-child 'Night Before' debauchery of Seth Rogan and pals, all your 'Holiday's' and 'Love Actually's' the John Hughes home aesthetic, 80's American of 'Planes, Trains And Automobiles' (hey isn't that Thanksgiving?! Still counts. You can't tell the difference as a kid. There's still a turkey on the table) and of course the greatest film of all-time, 'Uncle Buck'. And in this 'Once Upon A Deadpool', Savage no Fred's given time who could forget everyone's needs go-to cult, Christmas classic 'Elf'? Which 'Anchorman' Will Ferrell may be even better known now as. You stay classy Ron Burgundy. I've seen the fire in your eyes. We wouldn't like you when you're angry or told you have bad hair (I know that pain). And Buddy will be screaming SANTA at this one. Still he doesn't know him like this. But he isn't sitting on a throne of lies. Just a damaged sled and the need of a few more little helpers ('Fred Claus'' lawyers are on the phone) in the form of 'Babysitter' Judah Lewis and an introduction to Darby Camp, setting up shop as stars of the future born right now under your Christmas tree with all the tinsel trimmings.
'Angry Birds Movie' (yep...it's crazy to believe they actually made one all these years later) pitcher Clay Kaytis (expect C.G.I. elves halfway somewhere between those 'Trolls' and 'Snow White and the Huntsman' ones) throws us more than a bone here in the scraps of the seasonal greeting T.V. guides. This tale as old as Disney time is beauty and beast. And will make you squirt some like Bambi tragedy. As these kids and their mom ('Father Of The Bride' breakout star, now with kids of her own, Kimberly Williams-Paisley) are without their dad (played by her rocking around the Christmas tree 'Nashville' co-star Oliver Hudson. So they need more than a little belief to show them good tidings again. And following a thrilling sleigh ride through the skies and scrapers and some scrapes with the law (not to forget an inspired diner entry were Claus goes through each patrons Christmas wishes like the naughty and nice list) they may just make it to all that cookies and milk. Even if they wake up more than their fair share of stirring mice. Like brilliant Chicago P.D. beat cops Martin Roach and 'New Girl's' Lamorne Morris playing 'Lets Be Cops' like co-star and new Peter Parker 'Spider-Verse' animated Spider-Man Jake Johnson. Even 'Lillyhammer's' own E Street bandsman Steve Van Zandt is here for a musical number moment to never forget whilst his Boss is on Broadway with Netflix. But for all the cameos here, the best, simply perfect one belongs 'Overboard' like that comedy classics remake. We didn't want to spoil this cameo as it works better as a surprise (so look away now if you haven't already got on) but we are pretty late on this review (but still night before timely) and it's already been shared now like the Russell family Christmas card. But could you think of a more third bowl of porridge just right and fitting Mrs. Claus than Goldie Hawn? And if you even try to give me an answer to that I have some coal for your stocking. So Merry Christmas to you and yours, cuddle up by the fireplace and chill. Because on Donner, on Blitzen Netflix have something for your watching list you'll want to check twice. Ho ho, let's go TIM DAVID HARVEY.
Further Filming: 'Elf', 'A Murray Christmas', 'The Santa Clause'.
No comments:
Post a Comment