Saturday 29 December 2018

REVIEW: BIRD BOX

4/5

A Blind Side Place.

124 Mins. Starring: Sandra Bullock, Vivien Lyra Blair, Julien Edwards, Trevante Rhodes, Lil Rel Howery, BD Wong, Danielle MacDonald, Machine Gun Kelly, Parminder Nagra, David Dastmalchian, Jacki Weaver, Tom Hollander, John Malkovich & Sarah Paulson. Director: Susanne Bier.

A bird in the hand is worth a Netflix record breaking 45 million opening week streams. The highest of all-time for any of the services original films. But don't you dare cross them and call Sandra Bullock, "that lady from Bird Box". Show some respect! No other legendary actor today has her 'Gravity'. Aside from maybe her fellow 90's legendary like Washington or Hanks contemporary, Julia Roberts with her own streaming service 'Homecoming' showing on Amazon Prime this time right now. For every Robert's Oscar winning 'Erin Brokovich', Bullock has the Academy of 'The Blind Side'. For every 'Oceans 11' to '13' from Julia, Sandra has her own leading 'Oceans 8' franchise. Sister, not lover to Clooney's Rat Pack dapper Danny. No matter what mansplaining critics try and write off this all-female sequel like the Melissa McCarthy and Kristen Wiig 'Ghostbusters' remake, haunted only by their own ignorance. Both new terrific takes were exactly what both floundering franchises needed in a reboot boost. But if all that wasn't enough then just wait and watch like everyone else past the Netflix icon becoming as iconic as the Marvel comic-book flipping one at this chilling, compelling, hook, line and kitchen sink, psychological horror show. To an opening monologue from Sandra against type, full of barely restrained fury and simmering boiling pot lidded composure. Instructions that read almost like an award acceptance speech with that 'Gravity' gravitas in the Alfonso Cuaron year of 'Roma'. But in black and white it's plain to see that this leading actor shows the wonder of the strength that never strains and the deep dedication that never wanes of the by any means or lengths protection of a mother's love. Her emotional and physical descent back into the earth's atmosphere after being lost in space wasn't as rapid as this fall and wave of new age scares. Powerhouse performances don't come more punctuated! She won't be boxed in.

But remember your hands can't hit what your eyes can't see. And when this movie doesn't float like a butterfly you best believe it stings like a you know what. Black and yellow for hazard warning. 'The Night Manager's, 'Serena' and 'In A Better World' director Susanne Bier gives us a post apocalyptic one somewhere between 'World War Z' and 'I Am Legend', with 'The Book Of Eli' read religious references (Sandra paints some modern art that looks like an everyday people take on The Last Supper. Not to mention she rows a boat upstream through a river for the love of God) and more followers than those talking about this on their timelines. Like accomplished wonderkid child stars of the future, Vivien Lyra Blair and Julien Edwards poised with heart and emotion beyond their years. Or the 'Moonlight' of the third Chiron, Trevante Rhodes. Who after being the best thing about the fun 'Predator' reboot this Autumn almost steals the show here with the soul behind his muscle and the heart he frames here in his best picture moment. 'Uncle Drew's and 'Get Out' comic relief Lil Rel Howery provides help here too in that form. But his heart is more than light on this one. Whilst 'Gotham's' Hugo Strange and 'Jurassic Park' star in a whole new 'World' BD Wong continues his redemptive return to Hollywood. And Australian actress Danielle MacDonald of 'Patti Cake$' music and Dolly 'Dumplin' Netflix fame continues to rule. But in a cast that features 'Bend It Like Beckham's game kicker Parminder Nagra returning to the 'ER', or 'Dark Knight' and 'Ant-Man' actor David Dastmalchian born to play parts with a sinister streak (see the arresting 'Prisoners' were he almost makes Paul Dano's character seem normal), there's some real heavy hitters riding shotgun with the blunderbuss...even rap star Machine Gun Kelly. Like the 'Silver Linings Playbook' nominated Jacki Weaver hitting her peak with this and 'Widows'. Or 'Bohemian Rhapsody' Mr. Miami Beach himself, character actor Great Brit, Tom Hollander playing an anxiety riddled enigma. Whilst the ever weird and wonderful, maddening John Malkovich (currently showing the BBC in a 'Murder On The Orient Express' Agatha Christie adaptation time he can beat Branagh by playing the famous Poirot without the infamous moustache) is his best in years, with even some of that 'Con Air' craziness flying out of those angry eyes and expressions that take wing. But in an season later 'Oceans' reunion as Sandra's on-screen sister, 'The People VS OJ Simpson' bar passer and forthcoming 'Unbreakable' and 'Split' sequel joining, 'Glass' smasher, Sarah Paulson in a critical moment of crucial movie make or break ace acting of conviction is the emotional catalyst of this whole end of days reckoning. Although it's Bullock who has inspired all the memes and moments like she will reloading GIFs. Sorry Henry Cavill 'Mission Impossible' reloading fists of 'Fallout'. We have a new superhero now Kent. And she moves with even more bullet time speed Keanu. Just try and stop this 'Bird' actor from flying.

Canary in a coal-mine cage. Let this be a warning in the 'Hereditary' and 'Halloween' sequel/reboot horror renaissance of this year that started with last year's 'Get Out' and will continue with Jordan Peele and 'Us' next year. This may be akin to the searing senses psychology of this year's best horror without a word, 'A Quiet Place' married with the Fantastic couple to be Emily Blunt and John Krasinski. But the eyes to that ones ears in matrimony, this original ideas words (a book wrote by Josh Malerman in 2014) were wrote years before Hollywood's new power couple decided to keep it shut. So these two titans of the horror genre this year should go together like taste, touch and smell no discrimination in distinction. I can't wait for the next horror movie featuring Kristen Wiig and Paul Rudd wearing nose pegs. Working title 'You Smell Me' anyone? But this serious affair mines deeper than the usual sensory overload of look behind you, jump scare B.S. trope horrors to get to the mind of matters. With plenty of haunted heart and harrowing souls for every emotion. This story explores the madness of our own minds and how we can drive ourselves crazy even by what we can't see. Like the true nature of horror, what we can imagine is far worse than what's actually plain to see infront of our eyes as our mind plays tricks on us. The dichotomy of peaceful and evil minds and how they react to such stimuli in a desensitizing world also comes into play. As does the epidemic issue of suicide and what in the world actually drives us to that point of no return. That no one with respect and sympathy can truly understand like those on the the other side until they are right there themselves. A darkness I hope you never have to see. It's a lot to take in and on here so who would blame you if you try to look away. But this is one movie you can't take your eyes off in all our collective fears as a whole. Forget that Sandra Bullock and the two child stars of the future straight up look like Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles rowing around in that boat through the sewers of what a river wild has turned into with a washed up humanity. Or the fact that after seeing these rustling leaves in the wind, you'll never want to see another Autumn. Even if it is your favourite season. Believe the hype and watch this before you see any more hilarious meme spoilers you can't shield your eyes from on social media. Leave those tweets for the birds, get out the box, take off the blindfold and watch this. TIM DAVID HARVEY.

Further Filming: 'A Quiet Place', 'Hereditary', 'Gravity'.

BOOK REVIEW: JACKIE CHAN-NEVER GROW UP

4/5

Crazy, Rich, Amazing.

Never count Jackie Chan out. From Hong Kong to Hollywood the megastar has starred in around over 150 films and counting. But you know he's broken even more bones than that...and counting. Worldwide this superstar is one of the most globally recognised icons and idols in all of entertainment. Let alone the acting game he changed, redefining the all action hero to an everyman embrace. This pop star has even made albums...you saw him sing along to The Beach Boys on 'Rush Hour' too, don't deny it. There's a reason this million seller, billion served and counting even has had an honorary Oscar made for him. And this Academy member is the real deal to the award envelope. As 'Crazy Rich Asian' star and 'Supercop' co one (who came up from China with Chan and started this 'Crazy Rich' revolution of the continent you see today from the idols of BTS to Henry Golding even being in consideration for the running of the next, revolutionary James Bond), says Jackie has that, "infectious exuberance". Or as partner in crime stopping 'Rush' motormouth by the hour Chris Tucker simply and poignantly puts it, "I love you (Jackie). You're a part of me"! Even possibly the most recognisable and successful face in all of acting Tom Hanks coins it perfectly when immortalising the man who combined the action heroism of John Wayne with the comic timing of Buster Keaton when it came to making his own Hollywoodland legend, Jackie is just "Chantastic". And still to this day, from 'Police Story' to the 'Shanghai' series of noon and nights and the 'Rumble In The Bronx' to 'Kung Fu Yoga' this man who gave the Schwarzenegger age it's last action hero is far from expendable. No matter how hard Sly tried to get this franchise face in that all action, pension fund series. Chan once in Sylvester's Hollywood home, touched Stallone's Oscar, kissed it and probably held it infront of a mirror whilst rehearsing a speech. And on reflection he was right to. Although Jackie Chan as a moviemaking symbol himself is his own reward. And he's still doing it to this Netflix 'Skiptrace' streaming day. Taking on James Bond Pierce Brosnan in 'The Foreigner' and getting serious in his old age like the time he made you cry out of nowhere in the Smith family 'Karate Kid' reboot remake. But for all the stories this man has and still tells none are as real as the simple ode in his memoir to 'Never Grow Up' from the forever young Peter Pan that is Chan, who also never gives up.

Cannonball Chan. The young kid was nicknamed for running around everywhere with that infectious energy. His humble beginnings saw him bullied at school but he always knew how to fight back with his fists and wrists finding a new way home up in the hills. As his Chinese Civil War refugee parents found refuge working for the French Ambassador as they lived a team trip up Hong Kong's vivid Victoria Peak where a waxwork of him now resides in Madame Tussauds. A perfect, picturesque place where Jackie would look to the stars and the skyline of the city that would eventually belong to him in time. Lost in clouds wasn't the word. He was destined for them. And even when he got bored and boarding school called with a strict decade long institution, he was always going places but taking home with him. Even when his parents relocated to Australia and he'd sometimes join them for months at a time when the acting didn't quite pan out the way he read it in his life scripts before the die was cast. But this man who used to play dead perfectly to get on screen when he broke out as more than Bruce Lee fist of furry cannon fodder. As his entry to the industry in the legendary 'Enter The Dragon' saw him meet his idol face to fist first. Talk about being extra. Chan wanted to show the world the lighter, even realer side of the art he martialed. Bruce Lee looked invincible when he fought. Jackie wanted to show you it really hurt. But that there was a certain humor aswell as heart to it all. And Chan earned all his pain. His reel (you just can't call these things "bloopers") of stunt fails have made the legendary rounds on YouTube long before that video platform was even really a thing. When people were watching on desktops instead of phones. And you know to this day people would look up from their phones, even if they macably used them to point up and film. As Chan the man would fall from rooftops with only two bits of cloth to shroud his fall. Or fireman slide down the lightbulb smashing, electric eel like lights of a pole in the middle of the biggest mall you've seen this side of Christmas, top to bottom. Shutting it and almost himself down for good in the process. And then when his list of injuries medical report up like something out of that old arcade game 'Theme Hospital' his strained reaction always looks more like he stubbed his toe than stunted his whole damn body. This guy's broken everything in your body you could think of...even the stuff you can't...or simply don't want to. He's even nearly lost one of his pupils. And we aren't talking about one of the members of his iconic, family first stunt team (thankfully). But as the eye of Jackie Chan says, "Jackie always Ok"!

Reporting for the 'Police Story' precient franchise it became a whole new story for Jack Chan. He became a megawatt megastar and helped put Hong Kong on the moviemaking map of the planet like its own Hollywood...which he humbly doesn't give himself enough credit for here...so we will. Then came the money, the wining and dining, the women and of course the entourage. Think Jet Li in 'Fearless' when he's on top before he faces his greatest one and great fall. Chan even had his 'Pretty Woman' moment like revenge in a boutique store whose sale assistant looked down on him like Julia Roberts in that infamous, iconic scene. But this time walking down the street with an army of followers he brought out the whole, damn shop. But Jackie admits now that foolish arrogance like that cost him more than Hong Kong dollars. As he also laments with honest beauty of wisdom about standing on the beach watching the tide come in with the one that got away like being lost at sea. And after Hollywood came calling, from 'Rush Hour' to the "WOW" of Owen Wilson, Jackie reached all new levels of hills stardom. Although always remaining true to himself and his art. Even upstaging co-stars like Wilson and the attention chattering one-liners of the one and only Chris Tucker who were meant to do that to themselves to the man who was more than a one dimensional, one man funny fighting machine. Jackie and Tucker even combined for the first big budget, Hollywood blockbuster to feature no white males in the lead. This more than 20 calenders before this years 'Crazy, Rich Asian' revolution. Chan smartened up a previously ignorant industry all the way to the 'Tuxedo'. All whilst promoting positivity in his movies (he turned down Ridley Scott's offer for him to play a brutal Japanese gangster in the Osaka set 80's classic 'Black Rain' starring Michael Douglas, Andy Garcia and Ken Takakura). And he's still doing it today. All whilst practicing the preach of staying loyal to family and where you came from no matter the mistakes you make in this young life. Preserving history more than in movies like the historical drama 'Railroad Tigers', but also actually protecting artifacts from traditional Chinese history and bringing them back to where they belong. So Jackie Chan and the Hong Kong he has forever represented and camera captured to the world with that warm, award winning smiles story is far from over. And as he writes even more chapters to this verse it's great to look back on this perfect preface of decency, integrity, inspiration and dedication in all the rise and fall lessons that come with this life and its many loves. Because wonderfully wrote this is merely a bookmark. The 64 year old and only countryman with both a star on the Hollywood Walk of Fame and his hands in concrete outside the Mann's Chinese Theatre is just getting started. And like this one it'll be a story like no other. Chapter one. TIM DAVID HARVEY.

Thursday 27 December 2018

ANIME REVIEW: TOKYO GHOUL:RE

4/5

Ghoul In The Shell.

Snap your fingers like Thanos and put them together like BTS. Because that's it for the idolised 'Tokyo Ghoul' series...dust! Hold on to your Kagune's too, because it's been one hell of a fight for the city when it comes to these ghouls in translation. Fanboys and girls alike reacted like Ken Kaneki tasting a juicy burger for the first time post-op when they found that the anime didn't stick to the script of the sacred manga source material text. I've seen less strays in a rescue dog pound. But still this strain is in the same vein as the comics DNA. Blood for infected blood. And after the original and the square root of the 'Tokyo Ghoul√' Season 2 sequel, everyone with black irises will be holding red eyes like New York to Tokyo. As this show went third and fourth this year with a double barreled 'Tokyo Ghoul:re' reply. And with even more characters than there are wards in this iconic Japanese city of days of future past tradition and innovation, fans were left more confused than which Kaneki get-up to dress-up in for this year's Halloween just seems like yesterday gone. Do they go with the Joker smile zipped up underneath the surgical gas mask? Or the greyscale white suit and haired look of right now that's straight-out of a grown up district of Harajuku? Either way this Christmas Day ghoulish die-hard were treated like ghouls to the series finale of this 24 episode, epic event in the 11th hour of the 12th month this calendar.

Answer that. And with 're' reaching new heights it's a shame if this really is the last sayanora. Sure it went backwards like how you read Japanese books to the original story. Staying as faithful to where it came from as the HBO series 'Game Of Thrones' no longer waiting for the coming winter of George R.R. Martin's next book. 'Tokyo Ghoul' crossing over like Shibuya has made its own path, albeit whilst blazing it's own bookshelf like trail of chapters like it's madcap manga predecessor. Even giving us some spin-off one shots for the anticipation canon, featuring your favourite French fondant fancy Jack and a Bonnie and Clyde tail. But after some fits and starts 'Tokyo:re' looks to have finally hit it's stride. Even without the solitude welcoming place of social solace in the Antique coffee house, everyone wishes was a real shop like those anime purists visiting the real 'Garden Of Words' or all the 'Your Name' locations in the capital city from the train tracks to the rising red stairs. It's just a shame that now it's found its footing out of the dirt this may be the end. Four fingers down, albeit still feeling like a new, inventive anime like the elementary, Sherlock inspired (probably for legal reasons) 'Holmes In Kyoto' investigations. All whilst trying to get on the same shelf of all the 'One Piece's, 'Death Notes' of modern day classics like 'Attack On Titans' and 'My Hero Academia'. But in mixing elements of all the greats and its own strand, 'Tokyo Ghoul':re' is the perfect dark corner and neon jungle mix of death and heroism in a cynical age in need of a saviour for it's time.

That's why there's t-shirts rocked and posters on walls of this kid Ken everywhere from Asia to a Western wide world. It doesn't matter if all this is in Japanese, kids all over the earth will find a way to translate as this reply carries on tradition. The testament of haunting Haruki Murakami loneliness meets an artillery arms race of 'Ghost In The Shell' style action from the government to the ghouls. So stunning in its assimilation in aftermaths these vivid visuals of cartoon chereography stun the senses even more than the perfect, almost camera like capturing of the shimmering and simmering city of Tokyo itself. Drifting between ravishing realism and a 'Tron' turn like futuristic scope that is formidable as this classic is utterly compelling in its devotion depth of emotion. Inspiring more than a generation of geeked out fangirls and boys to rock an eye patch like they were still barnacled to Johnny Depp's Caribbean Jack Sparrow. They say anime is art and this high-note in all its punctuated perfection form is no exception. Deconstruct these demonic cells and you'll see more than the devil inside the details of the black and white paged grain. And it's all bookended beautifully by the terrific themes and sublime songs that have got as better as they have changed over the four seasons. From springing, bountiful cherry blossom to the autumn of a snow scaled crunching neon nights for your Crunchyroll. But as this all comes to a fleshed out head with us cannabalistic for more from this monster, how will it all end? In 'Tokyo Ghoul:re' Ken Kaneki reborn has been suffering an identity crisis more than his layered aesthetic. Some agreeing to be akin to this shows own success and struggles. But as it all concludes with a little teasing hint of more to regenerate and come he and us will know exactly who we all are, for better or worse. Some ghosts from our past never leave us. Some floating ghouls we wish never would as the light goes click. TIM DAVID HARVEY.

Further Filming: 'My Hero Academia', 'Death Note', 'Holmes In Kyoto'.

Tuesday 18 December 2018

REVIEW: THE CHRISTMAS CHRONICLES

3.5/5

Escape From New Year.

104 Mins. Starring: Kurt Russell, Judah Lewis, Darby Camp, Lamorne Morris, Martin Roach, Steve Van Zandt, Kimberly Williams-Paisley, Oliver Hudson & Goldie Hawn. Director: Clay Kaytis.

Ho! Ho! Oh no! He doesn't do that boys and girls. That's just a myth like the one about how he doesn't exist. C'mon! It's Christmas! And if this doesn't get you, or this Scrooge in the Christmas spirit the night before then God help us I don't know what elfin hell will. There's big trouble in little Chicagoland this season and we aren't talking about the Cubs chances of winning the pennant. It's a good job 'Escape From New York' and 'Little China' legend Kurt Russell (a man so much a cool as hell legend he even played a f###### planet on the second volume of 'Guardians Of The Galaxy'...and we still didn't think it was Ego...he kind of got away with it) has dusted off that 'Bone Tomahawk' and 'Tombstone' 'tache and beard he Western rocked for his big-three concluding 'The Hateful Eight'. Because Snake Plissken, Jack Burton and even the King, Elvis himself is dusting off the (sort of) big, red suit to play a grubby, grunged out version of yours truly, for one night a year, St. Nick. But this isn't the first time. Kurt once donned the get-up and set up shop as a mall Santa (and there's a tongue in reference here when you thought it wasn't time for Easter Eggs yet) for his son star of '22 Jump Street' and 'Overlord' Wyatt (Nice name Earp! Love it! Please tell me your dog's called Huckleberry?!) when the regular one quit his job for the working day like that Tic Tac dispensing one in the beat up station wagon from 'Home Alone'. Now how nice is that? Hash-tag, 'Father Of The Year'. And here "trading eight reindeer for 400 horses", red riding around in the American muscle of a Dodge Challenger for a sleigh. Dunking presents down your chimney like Chicago Bulls G.O.A.T. Michael Jordan. And prison cell block rocking out to 'Santa Claus Is Back In Town' with the Miami man 'Soprano' who backed up the boss, Bruce Springsteen off Broadway and E Street on 'Santa Claus Is Comin' To Town'. You better watch out. Kurt Russell is the greatest Father Christmas of all time off the Miracle on 34th Street. Sorry Tim Allen. You better not cry. You better not get kranky. UUUEEG!

Streaming Christmas cheer for everyone who pays for a Netflix account and all their friends who scrounge off them (hands up...I used to be guilty) to hear...and watch. The new way to watch movies gives us one of Yuletides best alongside the fellow 80's icon, turned second career wind cult legend, Bill Murray's 'Lost In Translation' reunion with Sofia Coppola. This time snowed in to New York's Carlyle Hotel for a singing special of the Rat Pack blues, lonely Christmas bliss alongside the likes of 'Oceans' own George Clooney and the beautiful 'Silent Night' of Miley Cyrus for 'A Murray Christmas'. As a matter of fact, put this stocking up by the fire next to Bill's 'Scrooged', the Nic Cage Christmas Carol of 'The Family Man', the man-child 'Night Before' debauchery of Seth Rogan and pals, all your 'Holiday's' and 'Love Actually's' the John Hughes home aesthetic, 80's American of 'Planes, Trains And Automobiles' (hey isn't that Thanksgiving?! Still counts. You can't tell the difference as a kid. There's still a turkey on the table) and of course the greatest film of all-time, 'Uncle Buck'. And in this 'Once Upon A Deadpool', Savage no Fred's given time who could forget everyone's needs go-to cult, Christmas classic 'Elf'? Which 'Anchorman' Will Ferrell may be even better known now as. You stay classy Ron Burgundy. I've seen the fire in your eyes. We wouldn't like you when you're angry or told you have bad hair (I know that pain). And Buddy will be screaming SANTA at this one. Still he doesn't know him like this. But he isn't sitting on a throne of lies. Just a damaged sled and the need of a few more little helpers ('Fred Claus'' lawyers are on the phone) in the form of 'Babysitter' Judah Lewis and an introduction to Darby Camp, setting up shop as stars of the future born right now under your Christmas tree with all the tinsel trimmings.

'Angry Birds Movie' (yep...it's crazy to believe they actually made one all these years later) pitcher Clay Kaytis (expect C.G.I. elves halfway somewhere between those 'Trolls' and 'Snow White and the Huntsman' ones) throws us more than a bone here in the scraps of the seasonal greeting T.V. guides. This tale as old as Disney time is beauty and beast. And will make you squirt some like Bambi tragedy. As these kids and their mom ('Father Of The Bride' breakout star, now with kids of her own, Kimberly Williams-Paisley) are without their dad (played by her rocking around the Christmas tree 'Nashville' co-star Oliver Hudson. So they need more than a little belief to show them good tidings again. And following a thrilling sleigh ride through the skies and scrapers and some scrapes with the law (not to forget an inspired diner entry were Claus goes through each patrons Christmas wishes like the naughty and nice list) they may just make it to all that cookies and milk. Even if they wake up more than their fair share of stirring mice. Like brilliant Chicago P.D. beat cops Martin Roach and 'New Girl's' Lamorne Morris playing 'Lets Be Cops' like co-star and new Peter Parker 'Spider-Verse' animated Spider-Man Jake Johnson. Even 'Lillyhammer's' own E Street bandsman Steve Van Zandt is here for a musical number moment to never forget whilst his Boss is on Broadway with Netflix. But for all the cameos here, the best, simply perfect one belongs 'Overboard' like that comedy classics remake. We didn't want to spoil this cameo as it works better as a surprise (so look away now if you haven't already got on) but we are pretty late on this review (but still night before timely) and it's already been shared now like the Russell family Christmas card. But could you think of a more third bowl of porridge just right and fitting Mrs. Claus than Goldie Hawn? And if you even try to give me an answer to that I have some coal for your stocking. So Merry Christmas to you and yours, cuddle up by the fireplace and chill. Because on Donner, on Blitzen Netflix have something for your watching list you'll want to check twice. Ho ho, let's go TIM DAVID HARVEY.

Further Filming: 'Elf', 'A Murray Christmas', 'The Santa Clause'.

Thursday 13 December 2018

REVIEW: AQUAMAN

4/5

The Fish That Saved DC.

143 Mins. Starring: Jason Momoa, Amber Heard, Willem Dafoe, Patrick Wilson, Yahya Abdul-Matten II, Michael Beach, Randall Park, Dolph Lundgren & Nicole Kidman. Director: James Wan.

Submerging from a sonic score and a soaring spectacle. The terrific theme of 'Aquaman' plays through the night of a downtown LA Live, as Jason Momoa's Arthur Curry walks through water and Brick slams down the base of his trident, whilst finally wearing the iconic scales of the DC get-up. All jumbotron across the road from Los Angeles' STAPLES Center. Home of the Los Angeles Lakers (not office supplies) and now what could possibly be the greatest player of all-time in Hollywood, LeBron James. We can hear the 'Game Of Thrones' and 'Stargate: Atlantis' star ask through the booming loudspeaker, "but what could be better than a King"? To which Amber Heard responds..."a hero". And right now DC need all the help they can get like Washington. No wonder they've enlisted an All-Star cast of tinsletown legends just in time for Christmas to surround their hulking hero with Thor strength. One who refuses to let his redefined, game changing Aquaman sink like a stone and become food for the fishes he will sleep with (not like that ladies) if everyone from Marvel to geeked out fan-critics have their say and way amongst the waves. A who's-who of players that includes a former 'Watchman', someone who loved 'Batman: Forever', an actual 'Spider-Man' goblin villain and even a man who fought 'Rocky' and even came back this year with his boy to take on the son of 'Creed II'. All for the center of this whirlpool who turned a blonde, skinny, running comic-book conversation joke on 'Robot Chicken', 'Family Guy' and thousands of forums started in mother's basements afterthought, to exactly it's former self that and the subject of every fangirls delight. Much to the revenge chargrin of the same fanboy jokers who are now getting bully bench pressed by their former victim. Now he's throwing starfish back. Just wait until he all wet, submerged on a Submarine after a bunker bar like brawl asks, "permission to come aboard". There will be a perfect storm wave of moans and groans. He's got you all, hook, line and sinker. Blowing everything out the water.

Swimming against the current though, DC isn't in as color T.V. dire straights as many people think (sort of). Cinematically speaking that is. After Christopher Nolan's 'Dark Knight' trilogy concluded with an epic 'Man Of Steel' tease, the soaring rise of the Justice League of America was still in everyone's anticipating good graces. And no matter what people say. And as crazy as auditioning the perfect Bryan Cranston to break bad and bread as Lex Luthor, before showing him the door when a more than capable Jesse Eisenberg comes in to read as the perfectly geeky, Jimmy Olsen (please just say he's his son Alex like that fan theory post that Christian Bale was still Batman) was. 'Batman v Superman' was a great movie until it's met it's Doomsday...and Martha's. Scoring visually and having similar themes and tropes to the 'Civil War' of Marvel's own stars and stripes and billionaire playboy that came AFTER it. Why the perfect honor of Henry Cavill and Ben Affleck's haunted Bruce Wayne and the brilliant solo movie he would have wrote and directed are no longer Superman and Batman is beyond me. That epic also introduced us to the wonder of  'Wonder Woman', that changed the superhero and blockbuster game and revolution like 'Black Panther', but before Wakanda, 'Captain Marvel' and '1984'. And now they're beating Marvel and their Sub Mariner under the sea with the coral Golden State of their King Curry and his sidekick that is anything but the little mermaid. It was only when the dark and distinctive DC bowed to the playful Marvel pressure and box office budget receipts. Not to forget their own Avenging Joss Whedon taking over directorial duties that we got our first real s### the superhero pajamas bed  wetting mess with last year's 'Justice League' assemble. It could have been so much more than meets the moustache. That's why everyone is campaigning to see the sought-after, darker Zach Snyder cut. Especially "obsessed" Jason Momoa. Whose scene-stealing Curry, riding the surf of his life above ground was one of the hot spots of this hodge podge. And now amongst all the supers and stars, this charismatic juggernaut teams up with 'Conjuring' director James Wan (who also put a new spin on the latest 'Fast and Furious' film) to conjure up a bright, effervescent, neon 'Avatar' meets 'Tron', meets '300' meets 'Valerian', C.G.I  candy cane color pallette of an Atlantic realm worthy of an Asgardian. Detective Comics big screen may finally soar above its small screen success from 'The Flash' to 'Gotham'.

Good tridents we bring to you and your king. With vivid visuals this hot spring warms Wintertime like sunset on the tide of paradise island. This is one end of the year blockbuster to fall for. And it's all because of the man that can unite the seven. Seas or Justice League's. This is the first Christmas in almost a decade where we haven't had either a 'Lord Of The Rings' shire or a 'Star Wars' universe to take our winter blues to an other worldy place. But it turns out after years looking at the stars instead of down at our feet, we actually had to plunge to the underwater depths to see a whole new world (did I just quote 'Aladdin'...I guess that's the closest I can get to 'The Little Mermaid'). Stingray ships as awesome as those themed 'Black Panther' jets. Sharks with frickin' lasers. Literal seahorses. A heralded Amber Heard performance in warrior queen, aqua marine green for go. The wonder of Willem Dafoe, who is such a legendary character actor he distinctly looks like every individual he plays. Norman Osborne's Green Goblin. Vincent Van Gogh. The damn demon in the 'Death Note' Netflix anime adaptation. The ever underrated character actor Patrick Wilson (just watch him bed bound in western wowzer 'Bone Tomahawk', reciting the purest poem he wrote for his wife) reuniting with horror director Wan whilst vying for the throne with Loki like treachery. Yahya Abdul-Matten II of 'The Get Down's' Black Manta (flanked by a formidable, fatherly Michael Beach of 'Third Watch', 'Beale Street' and 'Deep Blue Sea II') who is the greatest showman when it comes to villains who actually have a Killmonger like point...let alone a cause. 'Expendable' action hero Dolph Lundgren. Off the ropes of Drago and on dragon hearted formidable form as a weary warrior. Not to mention the ever growing, everlasting legend of Nicole Kidman looking as forever on top of her 'Days Of Thunder' game as she does young. About to do double Oscar duty with 'Boy Erased' and 'The Destroyer'. Giving this movie the gift of gravitas with her moving, mothering figure of catalyst inspiration. All this and all the bright lights and amazing action for the depth of your three dimensional IMAX cameras to capture. In a marvellous movie that even has something to say about what we as surface dwellers are doing to our high seas with all our purile plastic pollution. And if that isn't something to chomp on from this new school of fish than I don't know what else to say to keep you at bay. With DC's second, soaring success, superhero fatigue is a thing of the past. And 'The Spider Verse's has another chapter in its duelling December dominance like the Christmas christening of 'Once Upon A Deadpool'. Haven't we learned from the late, great Stan Lee that the super power of comic books is in showing the little guy in need of escapism that we can all be heroes no matter where we come from? Even if it is the bottom of a flushed away, spiralling plughole. Hopefully now like back in his golden days, Marvel and DC can coexist together like 'Ant-Man' star Randall Park crossing over here with intrigue. After all everyone with Captain America on their wall had Superman too. And this man who can Dr. Doolittle with the fish, armed with a Thor like hammer in his trident throwing realm rapture will soon have us all suiting up in King Arthur orange gold and seaweed green. Momoa making this man his Aqua own, like this deep blue sea scenery is magnificent. And you thought 'Aquaman' was an even bigger joke than what's been happening to DC in a world of Marvel? They never thought 'Aquaman' would be as big as a success like this. This is the biggest thing to happen in the jewel of the oceans since Moby Dick. Go fish! TIM DAVID HARVEY.

Further Filming: 'Justice League', 'Wonder Woman', 'Thor'.

Wednesday 12 December 2018

REVIEW: ONCE UPON A DEADPOOL

4/5

Savage Garden 

119 Mins. Starring: Ryan Reynolds, Morena Baccarin, Zazie Beetz, Julian Dennison, Brianna Hildebrand, Stefan Kapicic, Shiori Kutsuna, Leslie Uggams, Karan Soni, Bill Skarsgard, Terry Crews, Rob Delaney, T.J. Miller, Josh Brolin, Matt Damon, Brad Pitt & Fred Savage. Director: David Leitch.

"X marks more than the #### in this #&@ of a movie. What more could you $#@# from a new $$$$ X-Men team and f##### franchise of Marvel (redacted) that will c### from the X-Force across the (money shot)? And with daddy needing to express some (let's just say beep) in the best #@$ scenes you've seen in this #&$$ yet, every i### of this is so much more fun than a sandpaper ##@$. No need to #'№† yourself tonight." Well folks that's all we can safely give you from our original review of 'Deadpool 2', edited for the Parent Advisory: Explicit Content' generation. Paints a picture doesn't it?! But now we have to watch our P's and Q's and our F's and C U, next Tuesday's. As its Christmas time ladies and gentleman, boys and girls. And it turns out like Wu-Tang, 'Deadpool' is for the children. And nothing to fudge with. Twas the night before Christmas and all through the house not a creature was stirring...not even a Fred Savage. Wait! WHAT?! Fred Savage?! What the f...WOAH! Hold on there potty mouth. Ixnay on the F-nay. This is Canada people. Birthplace of Nickelback. "Never made it as a wise man. Couldn't cut it as a..." don't act like you don't know the rest. And besides this is 'Once Upon A Deadpool'. Just in time for the holidays this season's greetings is a yuletide special showing and reading of 'Deadpool 2' from Ryan Seacrest himself (it is Ryan Seacrest right?!) with no f###s given. Yes that's right the only F-Bomb here is 'The Wonder Years' of the middle-aged, baby face of Fred Savage. And unlike his baby bro this isn't 'Boy Meets World'. More like 'Dude That In This Soundstage Setup Looks Like He Still Lives In His Mums Basement Meets Ball Gag'. Because your favourite curly, coarse haired, pre-pubescent hero doesn't provide the "how is he saying this without moving those lips" freeze frame, zoomed in narrating monologue. But instead the color commentary and nerdgasm geeked out debates of what all is fanboys and girls were thinking but didn't have the Chimichangas to say. The narration is read from our one and only Mr. Pool himself, Wade Wilson. And although almost every girl in the world would love to have Ryan Reynolds read them a bedtime story as their gazing eyes try not to heavy lid doze off (apart from those who would rather it be his wife Blake Lively). Apparently you have to duct tape Senor Savage to his bed and kidnap him in his own home for him to lend you his ears...and pants!

Unbelievable! How rude. Kids twenty years later these days. Well it's time for you 'Stranger Things' young-uns taking more days off than Bueller (wrong coarse, curly haired man-child) to get your faces out of your phone's (ones back then had 'Wall Street' extendable cords that could really take your eye out like Hank Pym himself Michael Douglas). Because this movie is worth seeing again. If not for how well it holds up without a d### in its hand. One bleeped out bit is beyond inspired hilarity. But for the extra gags and 20 minutes worth of footage that play like an extended DVD special feature edition, or the 'Anchorman' alternative movie that was even classier than the actual Burgundy smooth sequel. This is the same merc with the mouth who has even been photobombing your favourite films DVD covers this year. From 'Predator' with a Supersoaker to 'Fight Club' (for the love of God don't drop that soap in the 'Worlds Softest Mouth' competition of the ice-box). Everyone's back too. Contractually obliged to appear in the same footage. Even reprises of Celine Dion's won't take it to seven but eleven, 'Ashes' theme song that, let's admit it now is even better than her 'Titanic' one. "Near...far. Wherever you are"! Come at me bro! Everyone's here. The world's funniest and most charismatic man not with an 'Ant' crawling over the first part of his name, Ryan Reynolds. Josh (how much Marvel money did you make this year?) Brolin, whose Winter Soldier arm is even better than that sort of significant part he had in the Avengers 'Infinity War' movie. Please don't click your fingers Barney. Just go back to farming. The twisted firestarter of New Zealand 'Wilderpeople' Julian Dennison, the perfect gangster mix of 2Pac and Ice Cube. 'Gotham's' own Morena Baccarin (wait...what?!). Everyones favourite cab driver, except that dude in the trunk, Karan Soni. The ultimate movie best friend T.J. Miller (NO! Not the guy who directed the first movie my first review). The X-Men this studio and director David Leitch who let 'John Wick' off the dead dog plot device leash could CGI fight, chrome dome afford without ripping the budget in half (*knowing wink*). Lead by the N.F.T. N.T.W. Brianna Hildebrand and her girlfriend Shiori Kutsuna (Hi Yukio! *Waves frantically*). And of course the all-star X-Force full of Pennywise clowns and Brooklyn double no in German's, lead by luck for us, straight out of 'Atlanta's' Zazie Beetz and the one and only, type A and B Peter. Not to mention if you need a hero Leslie Uggams' Grannypool. Your hands can't hit, what the wall can't see. Float like a Professor Xavier, Sting like what happened to Magneto's family.

X-Force is going to give it to ya (in a PG-13 way mind). And of course a class cast is joined by those classic cameos we can now spoil (but ALERT if you don't want to see, look away now). Like the split second, electric appearance of Brad Pitt who now can add superhero to his amazing character resume. As the blink and you'll miss it, perfect, rucksack rocking Vanisher. A now legendary gig he got that only cost Reynolds a coffee...brought in the DP suit. Imagine writing that on the side of a Starbucks cup with a straight face. And then of course there was f###### Matt Damon Jimmy Kimmel. Yep that was him fat suit and red necked up talking about the advantages of baby wipes and blow drys after an extended visit to the John after a foot-long. Yep, the man who played Loki literally in pantomime for a classic cameo in 'Thor: Ragnarok' is back for the second best surprise cameo of the year in the same feature film for another Marvel movie...although...well, you know. Beatles and Nickelback and all that. But no cameo is greater than the creator. And we aren't talking about the Wilson who thinks he is wading in the waters of a God, talking about a higher power before Tom Cruise 'Fallout' freefalling like Tom Petty out a plane to a 'MaGruber' lifted hilarious plot point twist. But the man who made this all happen. The late, great, one and only Stan Lee who apart from his "zip it Stan Lee" trailer testament was missing in this film, aside a Netflix like wall covering. Which is now graffiti covered with an even more fitting, beautiful tribute. But if you really, really stay after the credits like a true Marvel fan for the best post-credit, Cher 'Turn Back Through Time' you just have to see again and another gem that isn't Reynolds in a bathrobe or 'Hitman Bodyguard' co-star Sam Jackson in an eye-patch and a saucy leather number. Then you'll see such a hallmark, behind the scenes, homages and heartfelt tribute to the man and real hero behind every super from Spider-Man to Howard the Duck. More fitting than the bespectacled one and lasting C.G. cameo in the amazing animated Spider-Man 'Into The Spider-Verse' feature webbing everything up right now. The real Marvel has a lot to live up now as we wipe away the tears Captain. We're in the 'Endgame' now. Excelsior! And if that wasn't soulful enough, to those tearing down this Christmas tribute to one of the best blockbusters and superhero movies of the year that is now family friendly (sort of...depends on the family honestly), have a heart. Proceeds off the dollars made of this movie (after feeding the fat cats...we're looking at you Banner...stop busting through shirts, needle and thread getting real low) go to the 'Fudge Cancer's campaign in memory or Ryan's friend Connor McGrath. Now if that isn't heart, then I don't know what is. In a movie that when you take away the fucks (ahhh s###...my bad) is a lot more about love than a cornball writer like me could spoil. There's a message behind all this mess of ball sacks and diabetes...and I ain't talking about me. After all the only F word here is "family". F#####s! TIM DAVID HARVEY.

Further Filming: 'Deadpool 2', 'The Wonder Years', 'The Guernsey Literary And Potato Peel Society'.

Friday 7 December 2018

REVIEW: SPIDER-MAN: INTO THE SPIDER VERSE

4/5

Miles Ahead.

117 Mins. Starring: Shameik Moore, Hailee Steinfield, Marhershala Ali, Jake Johnson, Liev Schrieber, Brian Tyree Henry, Luna Lauren Velez, Zoë Kravitz, Nicolas Cage & Chris Pine. Story: Phil Lord.

Along came a water spout stream worth of spiders. I hope you don't have arachnophobia. Because there's more incy wincys in this Marvel verse than you can shake a rolled up comic-book at. Are your senses surprised? Since Marvel made major movies in the early 2000's we've had more arachnids than Peter Parker has had homework in the cinematic universe. Trying to juggle them all like our friendly, neighbourhood Spider-Man does a falling Mary Jane in one spidey strand hand and the whole MTA subway in another...all whilst trying to cram in that calculus test. From Amazing Spider-Man like Andrew Garfield, to Tobey Maguire not so dancing in the street, this teenager in a unitard has been giving everyone the finger-guns all whilst making the pizza (and you thought he moonlighted as a photo journalist...nope! HE'S A MENACE!). Now...dig...on...this! This just may be the best year for the web crawler created back in 1962 after the late, great, dearly departed Stan Lee saw a fly on his office wall during an otherwise dull working day, before coming up with something that his higher ups reacted to like Jonah Jameson or J.K. Simmons himself when Ryan Gosling refused to play the jazz set-list in 'La La Land'. "That's the worst idea I've ever heard"! "Everyone hates spiders"! "You can't call him Spider-Man"! But almost 60 years later we are still calling on New York's finest and will all the way to the year 2099...and Buzz beyond. And 2018 has been his most heroic 'Amazing Fantasy' since saving that businessman who has a little Jameson and some Lee to him in the back issue best seller of what was originally bottom of the pile until everyone in the coral picked it up. His greatest hits in a Rolling Stone long career for this Marvel Beatle like Lennon. Even though he's far from home next year or the long awaited M.C.U. 'Homecoming' he had last one. But in this one he's really gone to 'Infinity' (second Lightyear reference...'Toy Story 3' in cinemas near you soon) and even had his own game changing console feature for your custom made Playstation's. Which almost stole the show in this web as the most iconic incarnation...until now. And to think he's done all this whilst not feeling so good Mr. Stark.

Aunt May unplug that hoover! THAT'S NOT DUST! Marvel themselves have had their own uncanny, ultimate year like Wakanda Forever. In a war that was anything but 'Civil', bringing every hero in the galaxy and universe and pager birthing the rise of their own wonder woman, 'Captain Marvel' to lead next year's flight path and fight back. Even if Netflix has clicked their fingers on almost all the street-level heroes in defence of N.Y.C. despite surviving their own sophomore slumps and being the most streamed devil straight outta Hell's Kitchen. And you send this dish back? Yet we've still had the first female top-billing hero in 'Ant-Man and the Wasp' and we still have the rated Fred Savage 'Wonder Years' of 'Once Upon A Deadpool' to wait for under our tree. And let's not forget about the cult-hit 'Venom' which drew more Carnage (yep...I think we can call it like it is now Woody) from the symbiotic stream of spiders and even in post credit mode introduced us to more in animated fashion. Because now despite all that Marvel and their most popular hero (sorry Iron Man...and Cap. Wanna fight about it?) having a year that crazy string wrist aimed for the King Kong, tip-top of the Empire State Building this latest cinematic comic-book may just be the most original and outstanding movie hit yet. Refreshing anyone with the fear of superhero fatigue. And just when 'Aquaman' thought he had open water to dive. Now he may bomb as this insect may leave Jason Mamoa's bulked up, sexy redefinition of the wettest, nerdiest superhero even bullied by geeks as fish food. Because there is nothing out there right now like 'Spider-Man: Into The Spider Verse' and the chapters it adds to the sacred text of comic-book history. Bringing us every leg of the spiders bite and all the characters his teeth and venom have born in the ever expanding, world wide web. In an amazing animation that could even stamp on the Pixar lamp to shine a light on the in theatres spotlight of animated adaptations (like all those ninja and Adam West era tributing Batman's) with this uncanny, ultimate one. Showing us we all have our stage and we are all heroes. Thank you Stan. Thank you Spider-Man.

And glasses on the table, there is the most beautiful tribute to Stan Lee. And an all the more powerful, poignant and traditional, testimonial cameo due to its nature and the nature of what has happened. If only we could see more. But wouldn't it be great if the last Stan Lee cameo in a Marvel movie was in 'Avengers: Endgame' and had him surviving Thanos' snap mid chess game whilst his partner gets checkmated like, "nope! I don't think so". Before walking off to live in the M.C.U. forever?! The great man we all just lost a mere month ago. And whilst we're here. Dear Stan. Before it was cool today, your characters and YOUR character always made us feel like somebody when we felt like nobodies. Your comic creations, more than the movies will always be the core of Marvel. Showing us we are all heroes and don't have to hide behind a mask. And back to it if you think you have seen one of the best Spider-Man AND Marvel movies yet, then just wait until you wait around (yep that's still tradition here...wait! Where are you going?!) for the most heartfelt and then hilarious post-credit scenes we'd love to talk to you about, but would never spoil in a million years like the cameo we didn't even realize in a whole verse of guest voices from the best of the Hollywood generational great best. We thought we recognized some of our favourites. Now we have an excuse to watch again to really appreciate it all. But as for Sir Stan's actual CGI (it was always CGI people. Like 'Big Hero 6' it's an actual cartoon people) you know you better get those tissues ready. As one of his last ones is truly a lasting one. Poignant and perfect aren't the only words to do it justice. Beautiful does. It's a moment for life to savour in a movie full of every Easter Egg you could dream of feasting on in the entire canon of the Spider Verse. Memories to memes. There's even a Howard the Duck like Spider-Pig for all you Homer Simpson's. But the most fitting of all in a year that the redefinition of possibly the first Oscar winning superhero movie in 'Black Panther' that is now giving scholarships in school begun is the hoodie and custom issue classic Nike Air Jordan's suited up Miles Morales, played perfectly by the actor/rapper powerhouse Shameik Moore. Making a great equalizer, equality stand for everybody, no matter who they are, or where they come from. All whilst making us excited for the possibility of a Miles from tomorrow movie that Childish Gambino himself Donald Glover teased in Spider-Man's 'Homecoming'. Just like how 'Moonlight' Oscar winning actor Marhershala Ali (on the knockout 'True Detective', by the 'Green Book' form of his life) and his uncle character make us want to see Glover suit up as the prolific Prowler who here looks somewhere between Deadpool and Zurg (third). This class vocal cast sings. From 'Atlanta's' Brian Tyree Henry as Morales' policeman father (copping another inspirational, classic role in-between his 'Widows' and 'If Beale Street Could Talk' Oscar gold). With Luna Lauren Velez of 'Dexter' and 'New York Undercover' fames moving mothering by his side. There's so many iconic voices adding their signature style here from 'X-Men' Zoë Kravitz as Mary Jane like Zendaya, to a captain Steve Rogers commanding presence from Kirk and Steve Trevor himself Chris Pine. And an almost unrecognizable but undeniable Liev Schrieber trading the mob hands of 'Ray Donovan' to an oversized Kingpin (let's hope even with the sad cancellation of 'Daredevil' we get to say Vincent D'Onofrio's name as Fisk in a fistful of Spider-Man movies one day). But it's all the Spidey's caught in the web that have the real legs. From 'New Girl' and 'Jurassic World's' Jake Johnson's perfect Peter Parker (although as a nice touch Tobey Maguire was originally in the running), to the 'True Grit' of pitch perfect singer and 'Bumblebee' buzzing star Hailee Steinfield as the equally iconic, new star Spider-Gwen. But the real show stealer rediscovering the redemption of the twenty second wind of his career, like his one of a kind madness of 'Mandy' is the man who almost played the long hair, don't care of Superman himself, Nicolas Cage. Kicking ass again and leaving the sin city of Las Vegas again like when he was 'Raising Arizona' to Bogart bravado play Spider-Man Noir, wind behind his Dick Tracy coat and cap complete. And he delivers the best and funniest lines from the master building of 'LEGO Movie' director Phil Lord's story and his production partner Chris Miller. Putting the bricks together of a visual feast that even combines 'Ready Player One's like video game graphics to neon bright Japanese anime adaptations. All in all you're going to want to see this and get caught in this web and the strands it spins next. There's more verse versions to this. But in this love text to New York City it all begins with the Miles made by the one Spider that can crouch next to Parker as more than a sidekick, but his own showstopping stand. Now that's an ultimate homecoming kid. Web up! TIM DAVID HARVEY.

Further Filming: 'Venom', 'Avengers: Infinity War', 'Batman Ninja'.

Monday 3 December 2018

REVIEW: SORRY TO BOTHER YOU

4/5

No Apologies Necessary.

111 Mins. Starring: Lakeith Stanfield, Tessa Thompson, Jermaine Fowler, Omari Hardwick, Terry Crews, Patton Oswalt, David Cross, Steven Yeun, Danny Glover & Armie Hammer. Director: Boots Riley.

Hello (Lionel Richie voice). Pardon me. I'm sorry to call you at this hour. But my name's Tim Harvey and I review films. And If I could just have a moment of your time, I'd love to tell you about the latest package we at cinemas have on offer for you. 'I'm Sorry To Bother You'. Now let me be Frank. Let's cut to the chase. Here's the coup. Boots Riley of hip-hop outfit The Coup may have just directed one of the greatest, stinging, satirical, gratifying movies of the year...if not the last twelve. Move over 'Black Panther'. This is just as culturally important. Even if it is not a celebration, but a damnation. I trust you've seen Jordan Peele's 'Get Out' right?! Well this is crazier. Get out?! No I'm serious and please don't tell me to get out I'm only talking to you on the phone here (or am I?). Even Boots himself knows that laced up against Mars Blackmon himself, this outruns Spike Lee's most incendiary and influential story yet 'BlackKklansman' and what it has to say about real world racism back then and still to this motherf###### day. 'Sorry To Bother You' has a telemarketing premise. But this dialled up catalyst is more than just a cold call. As our life on the ropes lead Cassius Green wants to see his last name and hit the big time like Ali. So he can move out of his uncles ('Brooklyn 99's' Terry Crews on the folical and funny, one-line form of his life...yep, even more rib-tickling than the tongue of 'White Chicks') garage that doubles up as his apartment, missing rent like it is the old beat up car on the drive. Green finds a new day with a Dolly Parton office job. Now he has a desk too, but has less luck with people letting his voice into their homes than Jehovah Witnesses knocking on your door. I hear Prince had that faith and tried to spread the word, street to street...I guess the jokes on us hey?! That is until he goes full 'Chappelle Show' and puts on his best white voice. Sounding like Troy McClure (you may know him from such things as...'The Simpsons') has had sex with a helium balloon (sorry David Cross of 'Arrested Development's and that meme fame). And once that happens it's all about the George Washington's, as our regular Joe hero lives corperate large but sells out to do so. What does that tell you? Would you? Think fast as their are more questions and answers raised here like the arms of everyone whose going to be up in theirs about it or desperate to add their two cents to a movie that is in a class of its own. Why apologize?! Stuff like this is supposed to court controversy. And the only ones who owe one is those this satire as subtle as the nose as plainly on your face is jabbing bus throwing punches at. And if you can feel that you'll be glad you bothered.

If I was to tell you anymore I'd be spoiling the blaze of a trail this film that you should watch without a clue of a trailer seriously sears in all its hilarity to tears it leaves you with. So why are we still on the phone? Well, let me tell you about some of the people involved. There's the boss Boots, who will now be living the life of Riley after directing something no one has ever done and done this well and dog gone crazy ever...I mean like in the history of the cinema. 'Gone With The Wind' to this storm God damn right now. Don't believe me?! Good! I kind of don't want you to. So you will go see it for yourself. You have to watch this. As a matter of fact forget a money back guranteed. I'll take you myself. Just as long as you don't mind about the snacks. Your wide open mouth won't need any, let alone be able to take all of this. Man! You have no idea how much I want to talk to you about this. This crazy s### is driving me insane. In an inspiringly good way, believe me. So this is why you have to go. And then call me back, before you'll be doing this to everyone else too. You won't love something this strange, but at the same time straight-forward since you took two trips over the seasons to 'Atlanta'. Because this...THIS is America. If not the rest of the watching, woke world. You love Donald Glover right?! More than the only Donald we actually like. This serious singer and songwriter/amazing, acclaimed actor is probably the greatest artist in the world of entertainment right now. Forget Simba, this king has now taken Lando from Billy Dee too in this year of the new born stars. Hell of a 'Solo' gambit Gambino. Well the skinny on this guy stood next to Glover and Danny Glover too (no reason to get confused the 'Lethal Weapon' legend is in the booth here too. Proving he is anything but too old for this shiznit) is leading to the bulk of more meaty roles. And this is in the same year Brian Tyree Henry is having his biggest fall yet with his scene stealing in the Oscar fare of 'Widows', 'White Boy Rick' and favourite by moonlight, 'If Beale Street Could Talk'. Lakeith has already broke out ('Short Term 12', been in 'Selma' and played spirit animal Snoop Dogg ('Straight Outta Compton'). But now the man who from 'The Fifth Estate' to 'The Girl In The Spiders Web' right now, who has even been in an anime adaptation ('Death Note') is really affecting us with his signature anxiety-riddled, but fighter strength inside style. Even more so than the few but sledgehammer touching moments he had of repressed emotion and legendary lines delivered with definition in of course 'Get Out'. Stanfield is about to go around the world (and I, I) like Stansfield on every carpet in Handmaid red. Because this classic fit from the same alternate reality cloth of those features draped in real world, dystopian relevance is right now the funniest and forceful thing you'll see on screen if you look up from the distractions of yours. And Lakeith on an award tour worthy powerhouse performance of every emotion is key. He's just unlocked the big-three vault of his vaunted career. And with this indie this independent talent didn't have to play it safe or sell out to do so.

The only thing as much as an artistic knockout is 'Creed II' star Tessa Thompson. 'Dear White People' she's back! The 'Westworld' wonder and amazing actress has had an 'Annihilation' of a year after she came out the corner of 'Creed' and showed her all singing character. Before becoming the first bisexual superhero with her valiant Valkyrie in 'Thor 3' and we hope (like we do those Korg rumors to be true) after a 'Ragnarok' reunion in 'Men In Black 3', the next 'Avengers' movie. And here this artist with even more of her own agency makes a stand with urgency we all need to get behind or beside right at the same time as she gets back into Creed's corner too. Don't even try and stand in her way...you couldn't if you tried. She heads an incredible supporting cast including instantly recognizable from now, hilarious 'Superior Donuts' star Jermaine Fowler. The 'Power' of Omari Hardwick, muscling up a Slick Rick eye patch, bowler hat and even slicker beard. Growling beneath a Patton Oswalt voice more hilarious than that time he trolled the 'King Of Queens' sitcom cast by standing still and emotionless for the whole scene, even when it moved to the kitchen from the French windows of the living room. Or how about the 'Mayhem' of Steven Yeun. 'The Walking Dead' star being so good at a character that may leave you saying, "pass Lucille"! Everyone comes out Babe Ruth bat swinging. Especially the twin ambitions of 'The Social Network' double-act Armie Hammer. Who after trying to jumpstart classic, reworked franchises like 'The Lone Ranger' and 'The Man From U.N.C.L.E.' really made an award name for himself in the Italian classic, summer love smash 'Call Me By Your Name', which is now getting it's own sequel. Here he snortingly hilariously takes 'The Wolf Of Wall Street' douchebaggery to a whole new number. But yet after his last afforementioned movie you can't help but still love him. And if that wasn't enough this Forest Whitaker produced movie has even more hidden cameos and gems we won't reveal like the third act reveal that will...you know what, just you wait. Gonzo as f### doesn't do this red flag to injustice, justice. Subversive to society in this maddingly modern day. Taking a run at everything from the workhorse workforce, to the same not so subtle as they think, backhanded racism from white privilege that tried to get a shifting blame clause in the real horrors of 'Get Out', this is something to behold in this day and age. Pressure points in a critical time are pushed like the big, red button you shouldn't touch but you know you want to. Go on! Do you dare. As when it comes to this, that is right on the money. If you can't be bothered to up that ante then you'll be sorry. Because in the end we won't need to thank you for your time. You'll be glad you spent it. You have a good day now. All the best. Goodbye! TIM DAVID HARVEY.

Further Filming: 'Get Out', 'Atlanta', 'Dear White People'.