Symbiote For The Devil.
112 Mins. Starring: Tom Hardy, Michelle Williams, Riz Ahmed, Scott Haze, Reid Scott, Jenny Slate & Ron Cephas Jones. Director: Ruben Fleischer.
Eyes. Lungs. Pancreasss! Popcorn? So many snacks. 'Black Panther'. 'Infinity War'. 'Ant-Man and the Wasp'. Netflix? So much Marvel. So little time. Anti-Venom this anti-hero movie that right now looks to be the Bane of Tom Hardy's life...or at least 27% of it, all you like. But this writer decided to go in with a mind more open than one of Eddie Brock's victims. This isn't just a turd...rolling down the street...in the wind. This gonzo as f### Sony/Marvel hybrid may be a C.G.I. cluster#### carnage we can only wish was as 'Deadpool' R-rated, not P.G.-13 friendly like the Fred Savage cut coming this Christmas as this last line. But even in the epic finger-clicking end which Marvel or superhero movie (Hi D.C.!) isn't? And when it comes to this graphic novel, this is an adaptation incarnation the M.C.U. wouldn't have the balls to pull of (yeah...I know) like all that head (erm...). Even if Tom Hardy and Tom Holland want a homecoming Spider-verse crossover with Peter Parker which is probably too far from home right now. And from New York's Brooklyn Bridge to the Golden Gate of the Warriors bay (we see the Golden State 'The City' tee Tom...we wear one in bed too) Spider-Man's West Coast rival can still leap iconic buildings in a single bound (wait...isn't that Superman?) faster. Even if critics want to give this the Thanos snap like those paranoid geeks thinking that fans of Bradley Cooper and the new leading lady starlet's 'A Star Is Born' are going gaga and writing rotten reviews for all those killer tomatoes attacking. But I see no dust or evidence. And Hardy's new age, vlogging expose journo Brock on the other side of the Hudson undercovers more too. All the way to the fog and rock of Alcatraz island for a classic cameo even more than this Stan Lee one that we won't spoil like the rest of the press. But one that looks a lot like the love child of Sideshow Bob and Carrot Top (wait...isn't that Winter Olympian Shaun White?). So maybe it's time to put your tongue away like '21 Jump Street' and stop getting in a strop or a Channing "Tantrum" (you haven't seen that Facebook post). Because we've waited a long time for this one like Gambit. And as the boy Hardy sinks his teeth into this symbolic symbiote, 'Venom' will get into your veins.
Well...we guess Tom Hardy isn't clawing up to play The Wolverine anymore. Close...but no Canadian cigar. And we thought he'd be the right cut. But then again after the fade to noir of 'Logan' who could possibly follow the greatest showman Hugh Jackman as everyone's favourite X-Man they only wish could Fox crossover to the M.C.U.? But then again this 'Legend' is known for playing two people at the same time like the Kray twins. And now in playing the anti-hero Venom, who seems to be playing super a little too much for our liking, you never know. He's already played one villain, in his muscled and mumbled up, iconic Bane of 'The Dark Knight Rises'. So it won't break his back to do it again. The body of this Great Brit's work is protein powder powered and weight room, filmography ready. 'Bronson', 'Peaky Blinders', 'The Drop' and 'Locke' for starters anybody? And the 'Warrior' of few words ('Taboo', 'Lawless', 'The Revenant', 'Dunkirk' (well he did have a mask on...again) and of course 'Mad Max: Fury Road') is spitting them here with Venom. Oddball and offbeat talking to himself in so many weird and wonderful ways that the man who usually speaks script reams worth in just lines of dialogue reminds us of the charisma which endeared us to him in his dream scene stealing 'Inception'. And if you can't wake up and see it then you musn't be afraid to dream a little bigger darling. From awkward loner loser, to big brawling bruiser, Hardy nails Brock's Venom in all the horrors of it's possessing powers and all it's great power, but lack of responsibility, comic-timing fun. There's even a oil-slick mid-air stretching homage to Topher Grace that rips apart other hidden gems in this Easter Egg time. Crazy good, Hardy rides this horse until the wheels of his motorbike fall off. After an apartment breach and break, door opening to rival Cap and Buck, or Marv from 'Sin City' and his "I'll be right out" cop takedown. One instant classic chopper chase down the iconic hills of the streets of San Francisco is like a 'Bullitt' with Rorschach butterfly wings for Hardy. Arguably the closest we've got today to the Hollywood hard-man good ole days of McQueen. Forget "I am Groot". We.Are.Venom!
Bound to instantly dated C.G.I. cheaper than a date who doesn't go large with the snacks when he hears a voice in his head booming, "HUNGRY", does infect this movie however. With a venomous streak from a snake that may spell D.O.A. while their are plans to write a sequel. Especially in the final, third rocketman act that has more problems than Houston, in a 'Transformer' like digital fight mess that turns into a scud missile. But again...how many Marvel movies do that these days? For every 'Winter Soldier' take away the powers and suits like a bad connection on Netflix that makes for a classic action thriller that leads to a 'Civil War', we have one that takes us to the battle of green screen infinity. No matter your affinity. And anytime the clunky C.G. gets too messy, 'Zombieland' director Ruben Fleischer who knows how to flesh it out and handle machine gunning action by the Tommy ('Gangster Squad'), gives Tom's heavy lifting alter-ego the SWAT team smoke and mirrors treatment that echoes the horrors of the ominous opening score, that turns into a Terminator like dark and haunting need for an Ambulance. That we only wish was answered in siren call and response for the rest of the sometimes sanitised movie. A suggestive, old-school tension builder, that we suggest even movies like todays similar 'The Predator' B-movie throwback learns from like their classic predecessors that shoestring budget paved the way for these big blockbusters. Besides for the Linkin Park generation this does for better or graphics worse give off a vibe of early 2000's nostalgia, akin to the 'Fantastic Four' movies and the original Tobey Maguire 'Spider-Man' trilogy (my senses shudder at those dance moves down the street) back when Marvel had to cut a deal with everyone just to keep the lights on. Admit it they may not hold up today but you loved them way back then. Oh how the cinematic universe has changed. Thank you Robert Downey! So put some Limp Bizkit on your iPod, wear a woolly hat even though you're also in just a t-shirt and oversized jeans and keep that hair looking like you aint cut it since the 'Stranger Things' 80's (O.K. I'm basically describing me right now) and you'll feel right at home. The 'Kamikaze' lyrical fury of Eminem even does the theme song for crying out loud. There's just that much talent on offer here. As a matter of fact the cast including (?) reads like an Academy roll call in a six degrees of superhero seperation time were most leading men and women become Avengers and then memes. There's 'The Night Of', 'Nightcrawler' and 'Star Wars: Rogue One' actor Riz Ahmed who was so good in 'The Reluctant Fundamentalist', as a Mark Zuckerberg generation young villain with a playing God complex he brings in all his own self-made and promoting belief on conviction with no confliction. And 'Manchester By The Sea' and 'Shutter Island' amazing actress Michelle Williams gives depth to another studio tent-pole picture after 'The Greatest Showman' with Wolverine. This 'Blue Valentine' and Hardy's heart gives us one of Marvel's realest relationships yet in all its peaks and valleys in downtown San Fran. Even Captain America's real-life girlfriend, in 'Gifted' co-star Jenny Slate is here with all her gifts. Whilst 'Child Of God' actor Scott Haze earns every dime of his cheque with his goon for hire and 'Veep' actor Reid Scott's doctor is the perfect prescription for the nicest new boyfriend of your ex. And there's even room for 'This Is Us' ("I cry at this is us") actor Ron Cephas Jones in Jonah Jameson mode, whose 'Luke Cage' barbershop council does the full Marvel Cinematic Universe comic crossover. That's a dollar for the jar right there. And with this spider like symbiote even saving convenience store clerks from having their cash drawers rung like your friendly, neighbourhood Peter Parker, there's more to this verse than meets the web. They may spit that this Marvel monster bites. But let's not suck all the life out of 'Venom' yet before you play host. TIM DAVID HARVEY.
Further Filming: 'Spider-Man 3', 'Fantastic Four (2005)', 'The Punisher (2004)'.
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