Thursday 1 August 2019

REVIEW: HOBBS & SHAW

3.5/5

The Fast & Furious: London Drift.

136 Mins. Starring: Dwyane 'The Rock' Johnson, Jason Statham, Idris Elba, Vanessa Kirby, Eiza González, Cliff Curtis & Helen Mirren. Director: David Leitch.


"Cowboy Up!" Demands Dwyane 'The Rock' Johnson as Jason Statham drift careens his convertible under two crossover converging lorries in a gear shift, halfway homage to how Vin Diesel did it in the 'Fast & Furious', "new model, original parts" vehicle and the truck stop heists this fuel franchise was all about in the catalyst ignition start. London's 'Luther' Idris Elba follows, suit leather-clad on a motorbike, handlebars to the cement, surfing concrete waves in the Big Smoke and rearview mirrors. Then these two knights face each other and charge like a horse drawn duel. Two-wheels up a windshield later and former 'Ghost Rider' villain Elba with a spirit of vengeance takes off like Keanu Reeves' Duke Caboom and crashes right on through the top bunk of a big, red double-decker. Now that's how you catch a bus and crash a glorious heavy metal mess of a blockbuster spin-off scene. Taking the wheel and a left turn until the wheels fall off and the rims underneath spark fireworks louder than Big Ben at midnight, New Year. DUM! Between The Rock and a car chase it seems Dwyane Johnson has come up with many a hard place despite his sensationally successful solo act, wrestling Hollywood down to the cinematic canvas of the pin position. Coming to blows with Vin Diesel on the eight set that wasn't even for the film? Beef with Tyrese all over at least one of their Twitter's? Being replaced by 'Bumblebee' 'Transformer' spin-off star John Cena for the ninth 'Fast and Furious'? Even 'Stuber' ride along star Dave Bautista throwing green sick emoji shade? It's like the royal rumble all over again for the former concrete cement, stacked wrestler. But what I'm raising my eyebrows at is are we still just glossing over the fact that Jason Statham's Shaw character actually killed Sung Kang's Han in Tokyo for that post credit tease done even more shock and awesomely over well than anything Marvel have ever revealed (until last month's 'Far From Home' adventure) for a franchise that seemingly has as much staying power as those flying capes, never running out of road or Heathrow runway (you gotta let that go)? Justice for Han like Barb. And here he steals his patent move too! What's that supposed to mean? "Ahh sorry I blew you up buddy, but here we go why don't I rip off one of your signatures and take all the credit"! Ponce! Wait...did I just call Jason Statham a Ponce? I'm out...

London balding. Even though 'Hobbs & Shaw' sounds like a boring, British biscuit brand this is anything but bland. Opening up a tin of whoop ass on the first official 'Fast & Furious' tyre screeching spin-off. Akin to The Rock's 'Faster' with the benched up bravado of one of his 'Skyscraper' or 'San Andreas' blockbusters to a fault. Offset by some classic comedy chemistry and camaraderie with the cranky 'Transporter' Statham, like Dwyane Johnson shared with the likes of 'Central Intelligence' co-star Kevin Hart (can't wait to see them partner up again in the 'Jumanji' sequel?) across many movies. The insults are a sign of affection you know. If you grew up in the United Kingdom you'd know all about that...prick! Tetesterone, petroleum and a whole bunch of sodium in what they say. This suped up nitrus-no spoiler-will jolt you out your riding shotgun, "ejecto seato" cuz! When this writer is watching films he often shuffle adjusts in his seat and sits up for the exciting parts. Really sitting forward and taking notice, pedal to metal. This movie is full of those type of moments. Pick a door. Like Jason Statham in a mirrored corridor chereography, reflecting his plane bad guy take down, holding the baby in 'F8'. A part that resurrects the ever underrated 'Mechanic' who always gets the job done (and how about a mini Easter Egg that actually may be much bigger?). Hitting you with everything from a toaster to a vest that's supposed to stop bullets...not your face. Like his side-splitting star in 'Spy'. Easily one of the most hilarious things in years. Or The Rock Indiana Jonesin an actual helicopter off the chain. GET DAT CHOPPER! The new Schwarzenegger and Stallone's running mate are far from 'Expendable', even if their hairlines like this writers are. What more could you expect from dynamic, dynamite director David Leitch who gave us some film starring some guy named Keanu called 'John Wick' and then the Berlin wall breaking 'Atomic Blonde' and then didn't let up on the action chereography on the superior sequel, 'Deadpool 2'? Fast out of the frying pan and into the fire. Allow 'Furious' to reintroduce themselves like Hov. And if you thought the Jay-Z trailer was terrific, PSA then just you wait until this one let's rip. You couldn't even squeeze a fart between all this action. Even if a few sneak out like snakes on a plane to Moscow's mother Russia, mother f##### on another international Fast before the Netflix animated 'Fast and Furious Presents: Spy Racers' streams. There's still plenty of miles on this one. Air, land or what seems like a sea of rain for a stormy showdown finale as these two Lethal Weapon's sing 'Why Can't We Be Friends' like War. You get plenty of crash, bang, packed wallop for your cash dollar and buck.

Brixton baby! Black Superman vs Black Adam and the champagne problem who has none of that when it comes to uncorking the bottle cap challenge...although he's no Jedi, Donnie Yen...none of us are. When it comes to Idris Elba we already know the Big Smoke is 'Luther's' town. But here his big, bad baddie that's genetically engineered to be 'Terminator' like and super-strong (WHAT?! Well this is a former street-racing franchise which hasn't ruled out going to space (that's one small gear shift for Vin...) in a future, futuristic movie (WHAT?!)) makes his not exactly by the book DCI look as sweet as Vandross with his knees up, epic entrance. The tweed jacket is gone. This may not be Bond...yet. But with a 007 license to kill, shaking things up, a pot stirring Idris is having so much fun here with a self driving steel horse in Iron Man helmet, visor vision featuring gold Heimdall forever accents. And who needs Bond when you're Black Superman? So much so Elba wants his own origin movie. And you should definitely crown one to 'Mission Impossible: Fallout' star Vanessa Kirby as Shaw's sister with Rolling Stone sibling synchronicity. Biting grenades, flipping shotguns and soldiering up with Black Widow ass kicking spy smarts. Stealing the show like she accepted in the mission with top gun Cruise. Holding her own with the two big lugs like she would if given the rig of her own movie. Kirby on the curb and cusp of it all is her own star power now. And this isn't the only royal affair in this Great British brake off. As 'The Crown' star is joined by the Queen herself leading a cluster of classic cameos that are all familiar like this franchise feeling for family we would love to, but would never kiss and tell. No no Liz drawing knighting swords, but Dame Helen Mirren darling. Reprising her role from the last 'Fast', but this time behind prison perspex. Albeit as foul mouthed and filthy rich as ever with an accented support alongside the likes of 'Training Day' and 'Live Free and Die Hard' character actor great Cliff Curtis and 'Baby Driver' crook Eiza González back in the drivers seat as the mobster Magherita (no not the pizza). But it's not all fish and chips in this Daily Express. As London town's Statham and Kirby join The Rock in his Samoan homeland in a beautiful tribute to the man and his people, as these 'Bad Boys' head away from the city too on a 'Rush Hour' like banter return ticket flight for this buddy rock dynamic. All to land a haka like war dance of bulging eyes and pulled tongues and old school weapons now the guns have been thrown into the sea like Idris' Nelson Mandela told you to. Let's dance! Because with this 'copter and truck facing off like Travolta and Nic Cage losing his s### and sliding off the side of a cliff. This will keep you hanging on for dear blockbuster life this August. It looks like you picked the right door Pennywise for this chapter too. 'Fast and Furious' present their first spin-off that wins by a mile. It's a franchise in its own found like cars in your cereal box for the man who likes his dessert first. So give me the damn veggies! This 'Meg' meets 'Rampage' meat and potatoes brawn may not have brains, but it will fill you up like a tank that never runs on empty. 'Hobbs and Shaw' is a sure thing. TIM DAVID HARVEY.

Further Filming: 'The Fate Of The Furious', 'Furious Six', 'Bad Boys II'.

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