REVIEW: ETERNALS

3.5/5

Eternal Land. 

157 Mins. Starring: Gemma Chan, Richard Madden, Kumail Nanjiani, Lia McHugh, Brian Tyree Henry, Lauren Ridloff, Barry Keoghan, Don Lee, Harish Patel, Kit Harington, Salma Hayek & Angelina Jolie. Director: Chloé Zhao. 

BTS existing in the MCU (now that's one team of heroes I want to see assemble). Batman and Superman too (with no explicit mention to them being fictional. Maybe one day we will have the ultimate comic crossover). Even a 'Star Wars' colouring book staying inside the Disney lines of this multi-verse before 'Spider-Man: No Way Home' messes with the spell. Not to mention the first sex scene in a Marvel movie and even more groundbreaking, the first gay kiss. And let's not even get started on those incredible, game changing post-credits scene we wish we could. Forget about BTS for a second (fellow ARMY forgive me). So, who cares if this is one of the lowest rating and reviewed Marvel products. I loved 'Thor-The Dark World' (yeah I said it, it truly had 'Game Of Thrones' director vibes) and I love this. And it deserves its place on the big-screen like that 'Inhumans' pilot for another team that didn't get a big enough voice amongst all the Avengers and those 'Fantastic' Emily Blunt and John Krasinski rumors that are now being kept in a quiet place. The M.C.U. always had more teams than the NBA to play with in the sandbox and now with 'No Time To Die' and even more movies than Bond they can show-off that more than one group of Hollywood A-listers can have a license to CGI overkill it. Picking up for any plodding plot pandering for fan service and coming correct with the inclusive inspirations for much more than a ride with the box-ticking crowd. Label this one as Marvel's most moving and world embracing, game changing. Even if some territories have banned it due to the franchises refusal to cut the scene with the kiss. Like worldwide icon and global ambassador Angelina Jolie says it best, "I'm proud of Marvel." You can't help walk the path of equality without having a few stand in your way. Forget the hate. They always come for it anyway. They said that 'Shang-Chi and the Legend of the Ten Ring' was "an experiment" and "not worth the risk" in these COVID times. Than that film became the new 'Black Panther' for Asia, making Wakandan money. They'll say that 'Songs My Brothers Taught Me' and 'Daughters' director Chloé Zhao can't handle Hollywood stars and "real" actors, but how about what this visionary director did with her Oscar winning 'Nomadland' and Frances McDormand (and just look at how she handles real, earned emotion in 'The Rider'). They'll still cite Spielberg and Scorsese cape fear again in spite. But despite all this, Marvel is Eternal. 

"Well...that's just lazy writing." Cue the Ryan Reynolds 'Deadpool 2' fourth-wall break scene and now meme. World wars, Thanos, Tobey Maguire's Spider-Man dancing (it's canon now right?). They were never meant to interfere. This immortal race of alien 'Eternals' are older and more indestructible than Thor, even if they aren't friends from work...yet. And check out all the pretty CGI colour in gold lace like a 'Strange' spell or realms of 'Dark World' bi-frost neon before 'Ragnarok'. All as they arrive on an 'Independence Day' stunting ship that looks like the worlds coolest paperweight. These heroes in comic stance were only meant to protect the world from Deviants (no not the social ones you see everyday online). The Celestisl Arishem told, Ajak, Sersi, Ikaris, Kingo, Sprite, Phastos, Makkari, Druig, Gilgamesh, and Thena so. Besides they have bigger things to deal with like Goliath giants that world eating big look somewhere between an 'X-Men' Sentinel and what it will  convincly cinematically look like on the big IMAX screen when Marvel finally get to unleash Galactus on all the planets he'll pop like Skittles. Now taste THAT rainbow, children! Not to mention their own family drama coming to a Christmas table near you soon. As in a much needed break of levity one character breaks a table in half with "ANOTHER" Thor moment of classic comedy from Marvel. Between the heavy lifting of epic amounts of exposition explaining and round the table introductions for a superteam bigger than most K-pop groups (most), Zhao has fun with this Marvel land once given the green light like a 'Squid Game' doll turning its back to you (for now). All for some of the most amazing action and evoking emotion ever seen in a Marvel movie that moves in more ways than above ground. From Babylon to London and one beautiful Bollywood show in between. There's even one mesmerizing moment were a double-decker red bus in Camden doing its best 'Dark Knight' truck flip impression is turned into poppies before it can do anyone any damage. Even the driver survives (unlike all the people that led to the 'Civil War'), brushing his shoulders off and walking away to live another day with a story to tell. 

How about we meet these avenging aliens come guardians like angels for this galaxy? How about Gemma Chan to lead these 'Humans' coming to terms with their place on earth? The 'Crazy Rich Asians' star is a mega one in her own right coming into her stage here after graduating from a bit part in 'Captain Marvel'. This is a whole new character in the same world and she deserves it like former Marvel co-torch bearers like Killmonger Michael B. Jordan and Chris Evans' Cap...albeit they were different studios before the Marvel merger. Meanwhile doing his best Superman (he shoots lasers from both eyes, no Cyclops) meets Winter Soldier impression 'The Bodyguard' (no not that one) and 'Rocket Man' star that will always love her like Elton John will star spangles, Richard Madden is maddening in middling intensity of mannerisms in this 'Romeo and Juliet', 'Game Of Thrones' that tries to get all Shakespearean on us in the park. Because Jon Snow himself-who let's on more than he knows-Kit Harington (sidelined, but saddled there for a reason) is a local boy knight in shining armour that wishes he could be her king too. But it's 'Stuber' actor and podcaster Kumail Nanjiani and character actor favourite Harish Patel as his lovable valet that steal the show and do their own camerawork. Nanjiani handling the emotional heavy lifting like he has been doing in the weight room, along with the humour. And it's 'Totem' star Lia McHugh as Sprite with Tinkerbell like wishes for her Peter Pan that let's this soul fly too. Meanwhile Brian Tyree Henry brings the beating heart of family and that all-inclusive Marvel Hollywood eternal embrace to his character whilst the 'Godzilla vs Kong', 'Into The Spider-Verse' and 'Joker' actor co-stars of 'Atlanta' Zazie Beetz and Lakeith Stanfield come just as big in Netflix's all-black western 'The Harder They Fall'. 'Eternals' has soul like that 90's British pop group before the Spice Girls and before Louise became Mrs. Redknapp. It belongs to the faster than Flash Lauren Ridloff for your speeding bullets that this fall sees the 'Resurrections' return of 'The Matrix'. 'The Walking Dead' stars deaf character will mean so much for young kids looking up to her for inspiration and to see themselves in a hero. Whilst her close bond with Barry Keoghan (the 'Dunkirk' star who owned 'The Killing Of A Sacred Deer') is amongst our favourite things in this film...and that's under no mind control. Still, for all the heroes hired here, it's 'Train To Busan' South Korean star Don Lee who you must catch for his scene stealing and bruised soul performance that packs a wallop. Just don't drink his beer. The beautiful brute forming the friendship of a Hulk and Widow like bond with legend Angelina Jolie who absolutely kicks ass of one of the biggest actors this MCU studio copped like a vanishing cameo for the fourth wall and ball breaker who now calls Disney home like a 'Free Guy'. If that wasn't enough another icon in the form of Salma Hayek maintains a mothering presence throughout her legend here. With more stars than the Walk of Fame, what more could you want for this superhero landing that can even crack a concrete heart? Toxicity on Twitter and such dictates a dialogue of hate. Just look at the Hollywood stars of the Lakers. But real fans stay loyal to the gold. And that is something in this world of cape tugging criticism that will always ring true. To those who still believe in heroes, Marvel are eternally yours. TIM DAVID HARVEY. 

Further Filming: 'Inhumans', 'Shang-Chi and the Legend of the Ten Rings', 'Nomadland'.